So, we went to a screening for the Roze Filmdagen (the gay film festival) at the Amsterdam Library. The movie was good, but the best part was the venue. This library is ridiculous! It's... it's..., I mean, I felt like Marty McFly stepping out of his DeLorean in the year 2015. Everything was so high tech and stylish and hip!
We arrived an hour early and grabbed a bite at the Library's restaurant. When we stepped through the door a fast-talking Dutch man slapped two credit card-like devices in our hands, spouted some unintelligible directions, and ushered us upstairs. It was chic. Four-top counters with bar stools. Each counter had its own herb garden ("what do we do?" "Are we supposed to 
season our own meal?") After awhile we realized we would have to ask someone how to get food, as there seemed to be no waitstaff. Luckily I've gotten used to going up to strangers and saying, "I have no idea what I'm doing. Can you tell me how to (INSERT ANY SIMPLE DAILY ACTIVITY HERE)?" I was directed to a cafeteria-style counter, where people were queued in front of different signs. Pasta, Pizza, Salads, etc. I stepped into my 
line of choice and repeated my mantra. "I have no idea what I'm doing..." They asked what I wanted. I told them. They took the credit card device from me. They gave me a giant flashing remote control. They told me to come back when it started beeping and vibrating. Okaaaay....
season our own meal?") After awhile we realized we would have to ask someone how to get food, as there seemed to be no waitstaff. Luckily I've gotten used to going up to strangers and saying, "I have no idea what I'm doing. Can you tell me how to (INSERT ANY SIMPLE DAILY ACTIVITY HERE)?" I was directed to a cafeteria-style counter, where people were queued in front of different signs. Pasta, Pizza, Salads, etc. I stepped into my 
line of choice and repeated my mantra. "I have no idea what I'm doing..." They asked what I wanted. I told them. They took the credit card device from me. They gave me a giant flashing remote control. They told me to come back when it started beeping and vibrating. Okaaaay....Back in the Library's lobby, we noticed a long line was forming in front of the roped-off elevators. One glance and it 
was obvious these ladies were waiting for the movie we were here to see. We joined the line. Kim went to find the bathroom. She was gone a very long time. Just as some movement in the line began she returned, eyes wide. "That bathroom was insane!!" "Whaat? Why?" "Well, first you have to pay 20 cents. Then there are these day-glo glass..." But I didn't have time to find out the rest, because we were ushered into an elevator that quickly became packed to the gills. Elevators give me the giggles. I don't know why. So I was already on the verge when the doors closed and Kim leaned in and said, "Oh god, this elevator is packed with lesbians!" "Kchhhhhkk....".
When the doors opened, we were in the middle of some weird Dynasty cocktail party / Long Island wedding reception. There was a 70's-ish Price is Right game show happening in one corner. There was a lounge pianist camping it up in another. There were cocktail dresses and champagne flutes and up-dos. And then there was our elevator-load of leather jackets, buzz cuts and retro t-shirts. Everyone stood there for a second, then an usher cheerfully asked, "are you here for the film?" To which the first woman out of the doors replied, "Nooooooo!!" (ya think?) Now everyone was cackling.
The film's director and producer were in attendance, so after the screening there was a Q&A. We were stuck in the middle of a row and could not escape before it began. Luckily it was short and relatively painless.
Leaving the theatre, we had to make our way down six floors via escalator (they didn't want us waiting for the elevators in the middle of the Dynasty wedding reception). We got to see a lot of this "library" on our descent, though neither of us were convinced that was what it was despite the rows and rows of books. We kept getting off at different floors to touch stuff. "Look at the DVD selection!" "Look at the Mac monitors!" "Look at the giant white leather lounge chairs! The lights!" "What is this place? This can't be a library, can it??" We were getting looks from Library employees. Ah, the culturally stunted Americans.
I can't wait to go back on a nice summer day (dork). They've got a rooftop cafe overlooking the city and the water. A cup of coffee, a good book... anyone care to join?
The film's director and producer were in attendance, so after the screening there was a Q&A. We were stuck in the middle of a row and could not escape before it began. Luckily it was short and relatively painless.
Leaving the theatre, we had to make our way down six floors via escalator (they didn't want us waiting for the elevators in the middle of the Dynasty wedding reception). We got to see a lot of this "library" on our descent, though neither of us were convinced that was what it was despite the rows and rows of books. We kept getting off at different floors to touch stuff. "Look at the DVD selection!" "Look at the Mac monitors!" "Look at the giant white leather lounge chairs! The lights!" "What is this place? This can't be a library, can it??" We were getting looks from Library employees. Ah, the culturally stunted Americans.
I can't wait to go back on a nice summer day (dork). They've got a rooftop cafe overlooking the city and the water. A cup of coffee, a good book... anyone care to join?
No comments:
Post a Comment